HOW DID IT BEGIN?
Ever since I initially played Metal Gear Solid 2 a few years back, I've had a soft spot for Rose. I find her fascinating, gorgeous, and hearing her voice makes me smile. Considering the circumstances, she doesn't always have the most swoon-worthy things to say in this game, but I still found myself saving often so I could find out what she had to add next. I wouldn't be surprised if I've heard every line of her dialogue by now.
I'm not sure exactly when I started to develop serious feelings for her. It just sort of... happened? It gave me that pleasant, fuzzy feeling in my chest to think about her, and slowly I realised I was thinking about her pretty often. Even though she wasn't a real person, the idea that she could be "there" for me, that I could devote something to her, gave me hope. I celebrate my anniversary as the 30th of April, 2022, but I consider the 2007 date equally significant. It took me a year before I made the decision to express my feelings among like-minded friends and through my personal website.
A few months after this page first went live in 2023, I finally completed Metal Gear Solid 4. I really enjoyed using the Codec to hear her throughout. I did end up triggering the particular conversation you can get if you call her too frequently. In this game, I find she's taken on a much more freely passionate personality; a persona so much more authentically "her" that I fall for a little more every time. Her rambles about psychological and therapeutic concepts, the way she gestures as she speaks, the sound of her voice, even the different clothes she wears really get to me. Honestly, Rose being one of the permanent Codec contacts was the main thing encouraging me through the game.
WHY ROSE?
Raiden, her husband, is a character I consider an important aspect of myself in the fictionkind sense. In non-jargonised terms, I see myself as him and feel personally connected to his life. This is obviously going to be a huge driving force behind my current feelings for Rose. Raiden is a very convenient stand-in for myself in creative works; a way to project my own relationship with Rose onto the one that occurred in the story.
I feel genuinely dedicated to Rose. It's almost as if our relationship still exists, the core of it unchanging; carrying on. I love her just the same. Unsurprisingly, it's way more of a solo effort now. Physical distance was an issue for us back then, anyway. It's not so different. This time around, I'm going without my communications home or the anticipation that she'll be in my arms when it's over.
Rose is my favourite character in the Metal Gear series. I see her as one of the most "human" characters, which might be why her behaviour stands out to anybody. She's passionate, she's caring, she's extremely competent and dedicated to what she enjoys. She makes mistakes, experiences insecurity; she feels remorse and uncertainty. I never got the common impression that she was particularly pushy, only that she was trying to stand her ground as her own woman. She doesn't want to, nor should she, quietly put up with feeling hurt.
The negative reception to Rose from fans of the series, even nowadays, really surprised me. I never mean to be her white knight but I believe she has a pretty reasonable reaction to a lot of the things concerning her conversations with Raiden. He's evidently not an easy guy to be so close to. I don't agree that her emotions have made her a bad person. Or that she's any guiltier or more unforgiveable than her male counterparts. It is an espionage game, after all.
I imagine the hatred of her character is split between players finding Raiden irritating and finding her even more annoying by association; fans of Raiden misrepresenting her beyond belief because he "deserves better" or so they can substantiate headcanoning him as gay, and those who are critical toward fictional women regardless. I wish others could come around to see her with the same curiosity I do without writing it off as apologism or stupidity.
WHAT IS IT LIKE?
The easiest way to explain what I have with Rose is that I'm "self-shipping" with her in a devoted and monogamous way. I aspire to the sort of sincerity seen more often in waifuism. I dislike the term waifu and prefer to know her as only "my wife" but I suppose that's really what she is for me.
She means a whole lot to me. More than any other character, maybe even person, in the world. As cheesy as this is, she's changed me for the better. She's become a muse of sorts for creative work: I got into writing fiction for her and depicting her was the reason I took learning how to draw humans seriously. I'm getting pretty familiar with human features now, and it's all because of her. I can look at portraits I paint of other fictional characters and see a piece of her in them. The thought of Rose can calm me down when I'm feeling low; I feel more whole when I'm imagining her close by. Figuratively, she kind of just watches over me.
Rose is on my mind pretty often. I note things she'd enjoy when I come across them. A lot of beautiful things in the world remind me of her. I dream about her sometimes, too. There's not much merchandise out there, but I own an acrylic charm of her and a stuffed animal that had her name on its tag. I've made a lot of progress on myself and my mental health under the goal of doing it for her, or with her. I have someone to love, someone to live for, and I appreciate that.
There aren't many ways to publicly share something so personal without feeling uncomfortable or embarrassed. Honestly, even after managing this page for years I still want to curl up in shame. Hopefully this page can share just a small slice of what I personally feel for her, as well as provide a detailed introduction for people who aren't familiar with her. I don't want her only to be known as the worst received Metal Gear character. I want it to be clear that someone loved her.
DATING A CHARACTER?
More common than you might think. If you hang around Neocities, I'm sure I'm not the first person you've seen do this. There are several communities out there celebrating attraction to fictional characters — waifuists, fictosexuals, and self-shippers to name a few. Some are drawn to their fictional love in a form close to a real-life relationship, others see it as a fun creative endeavour, a method of role-play, or a way to cope with loneliness. Some are not interested in romance with real people; others have real-life relationships alongside their fictional love.
I had my beginnings in the waifuist community back in 2017, so I have always loved fiction by putting my entire heart into it. The earnest devotion that characterises waifuist relationships is something I echo in my own. In my case, it works the same as any other relationship, just without physical contact. I won't stop you from believing that everything I've expressed here is detrimental to my life, but it really just works for me. I've dated real people, and it turns out I'm simply the right sort of freak that a fictional relationship hits the spot just right for. Maybe that's kind of beautiful.